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112 posts
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INTERCEPTED TEXT: Ben Roethlisberger Makes A New Friend

  • October 26, 2021
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VZW FREE MSG: Welcome to Verizon and to your new iPhone 6. Get started on America’s most reliable network, Verizon. vzw.com/ new/mwelcome HELLO HANDPHONE. THIS IS BEN. VZW FREE MSG:…
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Hipster Cowboy Fans Claim Romo’s Latest Screwup Too Mainstream

  • October 26, 2021
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Ben Roethlisberger Makes A New Friend
Trevor, Angelique, and Karoline, three decidedly hipster Dallas Cowboy fans living in the trendy Silverlake region of Los Angeles, claim that Tony Romo’s late-game meltdown against the Washington Redskins on…
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Rex Ryan Unable To Hide Erection During Post Game Press Conference After Upset Of Saints

  • October 26, 2021
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Rex Ryan Unable To Hide Erection During Post Game Press Conference After Upset Of Saints
NEW YORK – After upsetting the heavily favored New Orleans Saints 26-20 Sunday, a jubilant Rex Ryan was unable to hide a massive erection during his post game press conference,…
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Eli Manning Forced To Eat Thanksgiving Dinner At Kids Table Again

  • October 26, 2021
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Eli Manning Forced To Eat Thanksgiving Dinner At Kids Table Again
NEW ORLEANS – Despite being a full 33 years old, Giants QB Eli Manning, was once again forced to sit at the “kids’ table” while attending Thanksgiving dinner with his…
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Battle Of The Boards: SAINTS-BENGALS

  • October 26, 2021
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BENGALS-SAINTS 10
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Architect Suddenly Remembers He Forgot To Put Bathrooms In New 49ers Stadium

  • October 26, 2021
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Architect Suddenly Remembers He Forgot To Put Bathrooms In New 49ers Stadium
SANTA CLARA, CA – As the San Francisco 49ers prepare to play the Denver Broncos Sunday in the first ever game to be played at Levi’s Stadium, the team’s long-awaited…
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Today In “You’re A Dumbass” : Ron Borges Talks Patriots Draft

  • October 26, 2021
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You’re a Dumbass
Boston Globe columnist Ron Borges, on the New England Patriots’ 2001 draft class: If you didn’t know better, you’d think the Jets sent Bill Belichick north to destroy the Patriots…
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Jerry Jones: “Check Out This ‘World’s Greatest G.M.’ Coffee Mug I Bought Myself”

  • October 26, 2021
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Jerry Jones
Hey, do y’all want to see something cool? Lookit, this coffee cup of mine. See what it says there on the side? “World’s Greatest G.M.” Pretty impressive, right? This here…
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Fans

  • October 26, 2021
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fans
“You Should NEVER Change Your Favorite Team,” Says Thrice Divorced Man Three-time divorcé, and lifelong Kansas City Chiefs supporter Graham Stevens has a message for what he calls the “fair-weather”…
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Eagles

  • October 26, 2021
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eagles
Andy Reid: “I’ll Keep Firing People Until We Figure Out Why We Can’t Win A Super Bowl” One day after firing defensive coordinator Juan Castillo, Eagles head coach Andy Reid,…
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