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ALTERNATE UNIVERSE: Seahawks Fans Won’t Shut Up About Their Five Super Bowl Victories

SEATTLE – Just two days before their teams square off in the NFC Championship game, the trash talking between fans of the Seattle Seahawks and San Francisco 49ers has reached…

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Football

Andy Reid Fired

KANSAS CITY – After Sunday night’s humiliating loss in which his team fell 27-17 to the rival Denver Broncos, Chiefs head coach Andy Reid was terminated by Kansas City today,…

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Football

American Sports Media Announces It Will No Longer Use The Name “Redskins” When Discussing NFL Playoff Scenarios

Washing Redskins Helmet On NFL Football Field

WASHINGTON, D.C. – In the wake of the 27-17 loss Monday night by the Washington area NFL team to the Seattle Seahawks, professional sports journalists from across all American media…

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ALTERNATE UNIVERSE: Tim Tebow Throws 7 Interceptions As Broncos Lose NFL Opener To Ravens

DENVER – Due in large part to the seven interceptions thrown by QB Tim Tebow, the Denver Broncos lost the 2013 NFL season opening game 49-27 to the world champion…

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ALTERNATE UNIVERSE: Skins’ Albert Haynesworth Wins Yet Another Defensive MVP

WASHINGTON, D.C. – After yet another season’s worth of thoroughly dominating line play, Redskins superstar Albert Haynesworth extended his NFL record by winning a fourth straight NFL Defensive MVP award,…

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Football

49ers Offer Terrell Owens Ceremonial One Day Contract; Owens Criticizes QB, Insults Coach, Plans Holdout

San Francisco 49ers management announced on Friday the team’s intention to sign free agent WR Terrell Owens to a ceremonial one-day contract. But upon seeing the terms of the deal,…

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Football

ALTERNATE UNIVERSE UPDATE: Vikings Still Laugh About That Time They Almost Traded For Herschel Walker

On the twentieth anniversary of the team’s first Super Bowl victory, members of the Minnesota Vikings 1990s dynasty looked back on the infamous “Trade-That-Almost -Was:” a proposed blockbuster deal that…

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Football

“Ah, Tony Romo, My Old Friend, We Meet Again,” by The Month of December

COWBOYS TONY ROMO Weaing wool cap for December weather blue jersey

Ah Tony Romo. Greetings to you, my old friend. Has it really been 12 months already since last you felt my wintery chill? Well, here we are again. You, with…

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Football

“Calvin Johnson is Gettin’ Laid Tonight,” Says Calvin Johnson

DETROIT – After powering the Lions to a 31-30 victory over the Dallas Cowboys by catching 14 passes for 329 yards, Lions WR Calvin Johnson Jr. loudly announced to everyone…

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Football

Aaron Rodgers Reports To Packers Training Camp 150 lbs. Overweight

DE PERE, WI – Aaron Rodgers shocked Packers players and coaches when the superstar QB weighed in for training camp today at 375 pounds, a full 150 pounds over his…

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