PRO FOOTBALL MOCK
Subscribe
PRO FOOTBALL MOCK
PRO FOOTBALL MOCK
  • Football

Aaron Rodgers: “Pay Me Like Tony Romo, or I’ll Start Playing Like Him”

  • August 3, 2021
  • admin
Aaron Rodgers
Total
0
Shares
0
0
0

Let’s talk about contracts for a second. Do you know what I’m scheduled to make this year? $9.25 million. That sounds pretty good right?

But hang on a second. Let me throw a few names at you: Peyton Manning. Joe Flacco. Tom Brady. Drew Brees. Eli Manning. Tony Romo. What do all these QB’s have in common? If you said, “they’re all players who are worse than you Aaron,” you’d be correct. But if you said, “They’re all players that are shockingly paid MORE than you are Aaron,” you’d be even correcter.

EVERY ONE of those dipshits makes more than me per season despite the fact that not a single man among them can measure up to my magnificent level of talent. That’s why I have a message for the Green Bay Packers: Start paying me like Tony Romo, or else I’m gonna start playing like Tony Romo.

That’s right, Packers brass. You want to see me start throwing interceptions late in a game when we’re trying to protect a lead? Or how about a fumble on a crucial third and long? Maybe you’d like it if I bungled some basic clock management on a potential game-winning drive? Hell, I could even take over as the holder for field goals, and let a snap slip right through my fingers on what could have been a playoff-clinching field goal. Do you want to watch me do any of those Tony Romo things? You don’t? Well then you better crack open the vault, because either I get Tony Romo cash, or you get Tony Romo play. The choice is yours.

Romo signed a $108 million deal with the Cowboys earlier this year, and he’s won a total of one playoff game in his mistake-filled life. Peyton Manning? His contract is worth $96 million, and that old bastard hasn’t won a playoff game in three frigging years. Joe Flacco? Joe Flacco signed a $120 million dollar contract despite the fact that he’s Joe Flacco. How in HELL can any of those yutzes make more cheddar than me?

Look, we can all agree that I’m the NFL’s best QB, right? On this fact there should be no debate. I’m a three-time Pro-Bowler, a Super Bowl champion, and I have an NFL MVP trophy sitting on my shelf. You’d think a resume like that would cause Packers GM Ted Thompson to shower me with more riches than any other athlete in human history. But no, Old Man Thompson thinks he can get away with paying me at a bargain basement level. Well guess what Teddy? Your Discount Double Days are over bitch, because it’s time for the Mighty Aaron Rodgers to get PAID.

So here’s my ultimatum to you, Green Bay: If you want Aaron Rodgers to play like Aaron Rodgers, then you better start paying Aaron Rodgers like Tony Romo, because if you insist on continuing to pay Aaron Rodgers what you currently pay Aaron Rodgers, than Aaron Rodgers is gonna start playing like Tony Romo. I can’t state it any more clearly than that.

Total
0
Shares
Share 0
Tweet 0
Pin it 0
admin

Next Article
  • Blog

ALTERNATE UNIVERSE: Seahawks Fans Won’t Shut Up About Their Five Super Bowl Victories

  • August 3, 2021
  • admin
View Post
You May Also Like
Argentina
View Post
  • Football

Argentina Offers Tony Romo $10 Million To Cheer For Brazil In World Cup Soccer

  • admin
  • October 26, 2021
Reggie White
View Post
  • Football

Roger Goodell Posthumously Suspends Reggie White

  • admin
  • October 26, 2021
ELI MANNING
View Post
  • Football

NFL Wristbands: Week 9

  • admin
  • October 26, 2021
Professional Football Team
View Post
  • Football

Tom Coughlin: “Hi There. Would You Like To Play RB For A Professional Football Team?”

  • admin
  • October 26, 2021
Play 60
View Post
  • Football

NFL ”Play 60” Event Ends Badly As Group Of 10-Year Olds Beat Giants 28-6

  • admin
  • October 26, 2021
Viking Hire Internet Commenter “URTEAMSUX658” As New Head Coach
View Post
  • Football

Viking Hire Internet Commenter “URTEAMSUX658” As New Head Coach

  • admin
  • October 26, 2021
BETWEEN THE LINES THE SUPER BOWL SHOWDOWN
View Post
  • Football

BETWEEN THE LINES: THE SUPER BOWL SHOWDOWN

  • admin
  • October 25, 2021
MERCHANDISE MEMES
View Post
  • Football

NFL MERCHANDISE MEMES October 2012

  • admin
  • October 25, 2021

Recent Posts

  • Lovie Smith Pretends To Be Listening To Headset To Avoid Jay Cutler
  • Bears Offensive Lineman Committing Too Many False Starts, Reports Girlfriend
  • Jeff George Deserves To Be In NFL Hall Of Fame, Says Nobody
  • Puppy Adopted By Michael Vick: “Goddammit”
  • Argentina Offers Tony Romo $10 Million To Cheer For Brazil In World Cup Soccer
PRO FOOTBALL MOCK
Copyright © 2021 | All rights reserved

Input your search keywords and press Enter.