Jason Hanson, on Being Added to Lions Ring of Honor: “The Lions Have a Ring of Honor?”

Updated: April 9, 2013

DETROIT – The Detroit Lions intend to commemorate recently retired kicker Jason Hanson by adding him to the team Ring of Honor at Ford Field, an honor to which the long time special teams star commented, “Really? Detroit has a ring of honor?”

Above: Hanson kicks a mid-range field goal, which was probably one of the teams' top highlights of whatever year this was.

Above: Hanson kicks a mid-range field goal, which was probably one of the teams’ top highlights of whatever year this was.


“Hey, no disrespect intended or anything,” continued the two-time pro bowler. “I’m flattered to be included in such a, um, prestigious group? I just didn’t know that was a thing. Seriously, they have one?”


“Yes, it’s a thing,” grumbled team owner William Clay Ford, Sr. “We’ve been an NFL franchise for eighty-three years, you know. We have twelve players in the Pro Football Hall of Fame. For Pete’s sake, we’ve won four NFL championships!”


When reminded that the Lions’ last league title came in 1957, Ford angrily slammed his fist to the podium and abrubtly ended the press conference.


Hanson, 42, has spent his entire career with the Lions, since being selected by the team in the 2nd round of the 1992 draft. He is the franchise’s all time leader in scoring and field goal percentage, and has been named all-pro three times during the course of an illustrious career that has landed him in the heretofore unknown Ring.

“Well, okay, great then,” concluded Hanson. “Thanks for this, you know, honor and everything. I’m truly humbled to be included among the list of Detroit Lions legends like Barry Sanders and, um… wait don’t tell me. There was a ‘Night Train’ guy too, I think.  And… um… there must be others, right? It can’t be a ‘ring’ with just two guys. Well, whoever else is in there, I’m happy to be on any list that features Barry Sanders, I guess.”

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