J.J. Watt Fails To Do Enough For Texans To Avoid Loss To Colts

Updated: October 10, 2014

HOUSTON – In a crucial divisional game against the reigning AFC South champs that his team desperately needed to win, Texans DE J.J. Watt completely failed yesterday to deliver his team a victory, instead allowing Houston to suffer a 33-28 defeat and letting down all his teammates and coaches, disappointed sources on the scene reported today.

Houston Texans DE J.J. Watt


“I just feel sick about this. I can’t apologize enough for not getting us that win,” said a sobbing Watt, whose two sacks, two QB pressures, two batted balls, and third quarter fumble return for a touchdown were not enough to ensure the victory. “I know I let down the entire Texans franchise and the entire city of Houston last night. I feel like a complete failure.”


“He can make all the excuses he wants, but the bottom line is the guy just didn’t get it done,” said cornerback Johnathan Joseph. “Where was he when T.Y. Hilton was catching 9 passes for 223 yards and a TD? Well, I’ll tell you where he wasn’t: anywhere near Hilton. You know how I know? Because I was covering that guy, and I never saw J.J. anywhere near him when he kept catching all those passes.”


Texans coach Bill O’Brien admitted the team is growing impatient with the fourth year defensive end.


“On this team, everyone has a job to do,” snapped a clearly frustrated O’Brien. “Our offensive linemen have a responsibility to hold their blocks. Our secondary has a responsibility to shut down the opposing receivers. And our quarterbacks and wideouts have a responsibility to not fumble at key moments in the game. And when those guys all fail to do those things, then J.J. Watt has a responsibility to overcome all of that somehow and still deliver a victory. But last night was the third time in six games this season that he’s failed to perform that simple task.”


O’Brien would not say whether the Texans plan on cutting Watt today, or waiting until Sunday morning, but one thing is clear: it appears J.J. Watt’s laziness and inconsistency have cost him his final shot at a roster spot on an NFL team.

Leave a Reply


  1. Guy Who Whispers "Penis"

    October 14, 2014 at 9:58 am

    *whispers* penis

  2. Pingback: JJ Watt is the NFL’s MVP, says the Shutdown Corner Podcast | whazhoz.com

  3. PjNob1e

    October 10, 2014 at 7:06 pm


    Goddamnit J.J. Watt! You lazy piece of trash! I saw no effort from him yesterday. The Texans need to cut that guy! 4 Years of Bullsh*t!

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