“I Was JUST Going To Take That Guy,” Said For First Time In Fantasy Football History

Updated: August 29, 2012

History was made in Wichita Falls, TX Friday Night when during the fourth round of the “Multiple Scoregasms” fantasy football league draft, Ronald Prescott, 36, looked at his friend Reggie Sweeney, 39, and said, “I don’t believe it. I was JUST going to take that guy.”


Fantasy Football Draft Party

“Hey, has anyone taken Arian Foster yet?” – some asshole in the 5th round, every year.

The never-before heard statement was uttered immediately after the ninth pick of the round, when Sweeney selected Patriots receiver Brandon Lloyd for his team, “The Silence of the Rams.” A clearly flustered Prescott slammed down his pen and turned angrily to Sweeney.


“Man, I don’t believe it. Look at my list. Here, look at it. He was the NEXT guy on there,” Sweeney insisted. “I was just going to take that guy, and you screwed me!”


Sources say the other members of the league were shocked that such an extraordinary coincidence could possibly have taken place.


“What are the odds?” asked Kevin Reynolds, 31, owner of “Taste the Dwayne Bowe.” “I mean, there’s something like 1,850 players in the NFL. We pick over 170 of them in a 15 round serpentine draft. The likelihood of one person picking a player immediately before someone else was planning on taking that exact same guy? My god, the chances on that must be infinitesimal.”


The shocking, history making statement elicited loud gasps from all other owners in attendance at the draft. “We were all shocked. Stunned, even,” echoed Paul Salvatorie, of the “Forte Year Old Virgins. “We had to stop the draft to figure out what to do next. It’s an unprecedented situation, and we had no idea how to handle it.”


Later in the eleventh round, Prescott made history again when, while selecting Tampa Bay RB LaGarrette Blount, become the first person ever in fantasy football to say the words, “I can’t believe this guy is still available!”


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