Group Of Trick-or-Treaters Dressed As Baltimore Ravens Beat Browns 27-6
CLEVELAND – A group of eleven trick-or-treaters, ranging in age from eight to twelve years old and each wearing a Baltimore Ravens Halloween costume, took to the field at FirstEnergy Stadium to compete in an impromptu game against the Cleveland Browns, where the youthful candy-seekers defeated the home team by a final score of 27-6.
“I’m not sure how it happened,” said Madison Young, 11, while wearing her Ray Rice costume and holding a bag of assorted sweets. “We were trick-or-treating around the neighborhood, and we decided to swing by that Browns stadium to see if they were giving out candy. I guess the Browns were having a late scrimmage, and when they saw our jerseys, they thought we were the real Ravens or something. One thing led to another and the next thing you know I’m catching a 65-yard touchdown pass from my friend Zach (10-year old Zachary Yoder, dressed for Halloween as Ravens QB Joe Flacco).
“We’re all frustrated by this loss” said Browns coach Rob Chudzinski. “Our cornerbacks were badly outplayed by their receivers despite being taller then them by at least a foot and a half on average. Their power blocking wore us down in the second half even though their five starting o-linemen weigh a combined 320 pounds. And try as we might, we simply couldn’t contain Terrell Suggs. Or at least, the 5th grade asthma-suffering adolescent wearing the Terrell Suggs jersey.”
“But you have to give them credit,” added Chudzinski “They took the field out there against us and proved exactly why they’re the Super Bowl champions, albeit in tiny, make-believe form.”
In related news, the actual Baltimore Ravens, off to a disappointing 3-4 start to their season, somehow managed to lose a Thursday scrimmage session against a visiting Ladies’ Sewing Circle tour group from Denver, several members of which were wearing blouses that were vaguely blue and orange-ish in color.