Green Bay Packers Completely Forget to Show Up for Draft
NEW YORK – Every single coach, scout, and personnel manager of the Green Bay Packers completely forgot that the 2013 NFL Draft was to be held Thursday evening, and consequently the franchise’s desk at Radio City Music Hall sat unoccupied as the first round passed with no team selection.
“This is pretty embarrassing to say the least,” explained Packers GM Ted Thompson, wearing a commemorative “I Heart NY” shirt he bought in Times Square for $15. “We’ve been running around the city checking out all the cool sites, and the whole draft thing just completely slipped our mind. We went to the Statue of Liberty in the morning, then Central Park in the afternoon for a horse-drawn carriage ride. Afterwords, we all stopped for dinner at this little sports bar we found on W. 76th. And while we’re sitting there, we look up and see the draft on ESPN, and we were all like, ‘Uh-oh!”
With no team representatives in place, the Packers had to forfeit their 26th pick of the draft, despite their best efforts.
“We all ran out of the restaurant, and tried to hail a cab,” said head coach Mike McCarthy. “Meantime, I was on my cellphone trying to call Rick (Vikings general manager Rick Spielman), and I’m telling him, ‘Dude, we pick right after you. Just take someone for us. A lineman or whatever.’ But he couldn’t hear what I was saying because my carrier is AT&T and… you know.”
With no first round pick as a result of the mishap, the Packers know there will be even greater pressure on the team’s choice in Friday’s second round.
“Yeah, we really need to get someone good tomorrow now that we messed up today’s pick,” said Thompson. “Problem is, we have ‘Book of Mormon’ tickets for the 2:00 matinée. I just hope we’re done in time to make it to Radio City.”