Ghost Of Tom Landry Horrified To See What’s Become Of Cowboys

By
Updated: September 7, 2014

DALLAS – Looking down from a perch high in the rafters of AT&T stadium, the ghost of Dallas coaching legend Tom Landry watched his former team lose to the San Francisco 49ers 28-17 on Sunday, and was horrified to discover what had become of the once proud franchise.

FLYING TOM LANDRY ANGEL

 

“My goodness, that team is just awful,” Landry’s shaken spirit said. “They couldn’t cover. They couldn’t tackle. They made silly mental mistakes. And how many times did that quarterback of theirs turn the ball over? Three? Four? It was simply disgraceful.”

 

Landry, whose soul transitioned to its current ghostly state in February of 2000, told reporters he made a special trip to Texas this weekend in order to watch his former team play.

 

“I was talking recently with the ghost of Al Davis, and he told me about the struggles the Cowboys have had in the 2000’s. So I decided to see for myself by floating back into town to watch their game today, and I was flabbergasted by how untalented, and poorly coached they seem to be. Just sloppy, sloppy football.”

 

Added Landry: “I felt like I was watching one of those perennially awful teams like the Seattle Seahawks or the New England Patriots.”

 

Landry’s ghost said that during the twelve years he’s spent in the Great Beyond, he hasn’t kept track of his former team very closely.

 

“Well, I’ve kept myself pretty busy honestly,” the deceased coaching legend said. “Most Sundays, I usually just fly out to the country somewhere to play paintball with Lombardi, Halas, and Gibbs.”

 

When informed that Joe Gibbs wasn’t technically dead, Landry stated, “No, I’m talking about Eddie Gibbs. He’s a plumber from Vancouver who got killed last year by a moose. Jeez, is it okay with you guys if I have some friends who AREN’T coaches?”

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19 Comments

  1. Copycat

    September 10, 2014 at 10:40 am

    Yes. You have gone too far CD guy. You strayed from the art of pretending to be a fellow troll…by making it obvious that you are an impostor. I hereby banish you from TFOT and take your stupid CD website with you.

  2. Master of Trolling and Fucking with Other Trolls (T.F.O.T)

    September 9, 2014 at 9:45 pm

    Yes. You have gone too far CD guy. You strayed from the art of pretending to be a fellow troll…by making it obvious that you are an impostor. I hereby banish you from TFOT and take your stupid CD website with you.

  3. Anonymous

    September 9, 2014 at 7:35 pm

    ^^^Stop being a piece of shit we all know that the real guy who hates Russell Wilson just sticks to hating. I know your trying to make fun of him, but your just being a real dumbass CD guy. Plus I am starting to think your gay for Russell Wilson in real life now. Since you won’t SHUT UP about it now.

  4. Guy Who Hates Russell Wilson

    September 9, 2014 at 6:07 pm

    As much as I love One Direction, and I do LOVE THEM, I would give up a One Direction bukake fest all over my face just to spend one minute with my hero, Russell Wilson, the greatest quarterback in the league.

  5. Random

    September 8, 2014 at 9:58 pm

    What do you call a dickless, hopeless, wretched piece of shit who is drunk on power and NOT a member of the US government?

    Roger Goodell

  6. AnonyMOOSE

    September 8, 2014 at 5:58 pm

    What do you call it when Copycat posts something other than a copy-paste of the previous post?

    Hell freezing over

  7. Copycat

    September 8, 2014 at 2:39 pm

    Q: What do you call a Dallas Cowboy with a Super Bowl ring?

    A: Old.

  8. Bloot Pooner

    September 8, 2014 at 10:28 am

    Q: What do you call a Dallas Cowboy with a Super Bowl ring?

    A: Old.

  9. Tom Brady

    September 8, 2014 at 9:45 am

    Yeah? Well fuck Colin Chokesondik and especially fuck Ryan Tannehill

  10. Anonymous

    September 8, 2014 at 7:24 am

    ^^^ Colin Kaepernick: *Cums in his pants when he’s reminded the Dolphins beat the Patriots yesterday*

  11. Cam Wake

    September 8, 2014 at 12:54 am

    RELEASE THE KRAKEN, MOTHERFUCKERS!

  12. Maverick Mopete

    September 8, 2014 at 12:21 am

    It’s funny (and rather pathetic) because your every post is simply copying and pasting the previous one.

  13. Colin Kaepernick

    September 8, 2014 at 12:20 am

    We beat the patriots ! Woooeah!

  14. Copycat

    September 7, 2014 at 11:28 pm

    IT’S FUNNY BECAUSE TONY ROMO IS GAY, JUST LIKE AARON RODGERS.

  15. Ben Roethlisberger

    September 7, 2014 at 7:44 pm

    IT’S FUNNY BECAUSE TONY ROMO IS GAY, JUST LIKE AARON RODGERS.

  16. Colin Kaepernick

    September 7, 2014 at 7:43 pm

    You can forget about that now! SUCK IT, TONY HOMO!

  17. No One Ever

    September 7, 2014 at 5:56 pm

    I disagree with you all. I think the Cowboys are a premier NFL team and will go all the way this year, 16-0.

  18. Captain Obvious

    September 7, 2014 at 5:51 pm

    Because the cowboys suck now.

  19. Wes Welker

    September 7, 2014 at 5:47 pm

    Dude. That guy’s like flying above the stadium! I gotta find out what he’s on. (Er, for a friend that is. I would never use it myself, you understand.)

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