Great news everyone. THE LIONS ARE ALL ALONE IN FIRST PLACE IN THE NFC NORTH!
Like . Comment . Share . 6 hours ago
Looks like this could finally be our year. RT if you agree.
6 hours ago . Like
Seriously, Stafford? You’re bragging about winning a stupid preseason game?
Why not? We all know the preseason is a highly accurate indicator for what the regular season will be like
6 hours ago . Like .
The 2008 Lions who went 4-0 in the preseason, only to finish the regular season 0-16 strongly disagree with this.
The best part of the Lions-Jets game was seeing Mark Sanchez throw a Pick-6 on his very first series.
Congrats on already being in mid-season form Sanchez
I’M SICK OF YOU ASSHOLES TEASING ME. I’M NOWHERE NEAR AS BAD AS YOU…
What happened to the rest of his response?
Someone intercepted it.
Well, I’d like to congratulate YouTube star Havard “Kickalicious” Rugland on his excellent game. He’s got a good chance to make our roster!
Yeah, you two should go great together. “Kickalicious” and “Suck-a-lottus”
HAHA. WHAT A BUNCH OF JIVE TURKEYS.
Um… Riley Cooper? Is that you?
SHO’ THING, HOMEBOY.
Why does your profile picture look all…. weird?
Pretty cool huh? Coach Kelly told me I need to make amends for the N-bomb I dropped a couple of weeks ago. So I'm trying to assimilate into the African-American community
BY WEARING BLACKFACE?!?!
Yep. And this sweet Jheri-curl afro wig
Paula Deen, Michael Richards, and Mel Gibson like this
It's really given me insight into how judgmental people can be. You wouldn't believe some of the looks I've gotten today.
COOPER THAT IS ** INCREDIBLY ** RACIST
Oh really? And I suppose you think it’s racist to try and gain a better understanding of black culture by walking around town wearing this outfit and singing “We shall overcome?”
YES! YES IT IS!
IT’S UNBELIEVABLY, UNFORGIVABLY RACIST.
Folks, we disavow all association with Riley Cooper and his bigoted ways.
And the entire rest of the Eagles roster too, just to be safe.
Look, we can all agree that Riley Cooper is a mouth-breathing racist douchegoblin. Let’s move on to discussing MY Texans’ spectacular 4th quarter comeback against Christian Ponder and his Vikettes.
5 hours ago . Like
SEVENTEEN UNANSWERED POINTS IN THE SECOND HALF, WHOOOO!
To be clear Schaub, you only played in the first half. The one where we outscored you 13-10.
That just proves how valuable I am. If we hadn’t lost that first half, we never would have made the crucial halftime adjustments necessary to whip your ass.
ALL THAT GAME PROVED IS THAT YOUR 4th STRINGERS ARE BETTER THAN OUR 4th STRINGERS
And all of them are better than the Jaguars’ starters.
Well my Redskins won our game despite not having a quarterback in the starting lineup.
You know damn well that * I * started that game, Griffin
Like I said, my Redskins won our game despite not having a quarterback in the starting lineup.
So how's your leg feeling Robert?
My leg feels great! Dr. Andrews says I'm on pace to start the season opener.
And how about your lingering concussion symptoms?
Geez, isn't this bit played out yet?
The bit where Griffin’s concussion makes him say the same thing over and over when someone asks him a question like, “How’s your leg feeling?”
I hope all you old-timers saw me LIGHT IT UP in my first game as a Bill?
You completed 16 passes, and gained a whopping 107 yards, rookie.
My god, I could spike the ball 16 times in a row and gain more yards than that.
Doesn’t matter. WE WON THE GAME.
I AM YOUR ANSWER, BUFFALO!
Only if the question is, “Who will win this year’s “JaMarcus Russell Award For The Year’s Biggest Draft Bust?”
FO’ SHIZZLE MY NIZZLE
Hey, I'm back in the NFL everyone!
4 hours ago . Like
Haha. Good one, Young.
No, seriously, I am.
As what? A popcorn vendor?
EAT A DICK. Green Bay signed me to be Aaron Rodger’s backup.
Green Bay gave a contract to YOUR washed up ass? Geez, what did they offer you?
A warm bed and a hot meal, I’m guessing.
BECAUSE VINCE YOUNG LOST ALL HIS MONEY AND IS BASICALLY A HOBO.
SHUT YOUR DUNG-GUZZLING MOUTH, YOUNG.
YOU THINK I WANT EVERYONE KNOWING THAT MY BACKUP IS A BROKEN DOWN, HAS-BEEN, RUBBERARMED FUCKJOB LIKE YOU?
NOT COOL, AARON. I bet there are some people who would love to see me running the Packers’ offense
Who are, “The Lions, Vikings, and Bears?”
Hey, quit complaining Rodgers. Trust me, the absolute BEST insurance for a QB’s job security is to have a worthless, shitty backup.
4 hours ago . Like .
Mark Sanchez likes this
That's right Aaron. You know what they say: you should never fuck a gift horse in the mouth
THAT IS *NOT* HOW THAT PHRASE GOES BRADFORD.
Oh, sorry. My bad.
You know what they say: you should ALWAYS fuck a gift horse in the mouth.
No Bradford, you’re not supposed to fuck any kind of horse, in the mouth or anywhere else.
Geez, you sound just like that uptight security guard at the petting zoo.
HAHA. WHITE PEOPLE BE CRAZY
Former Cowboys head coach Barry Switzer?
You fellas hear about my good deed over the weekend? I rescued a dying dog from a locked car.
Sure did. That’s actually a very heartwarming story, Coach Switzer.
Yep. I just can’t bear to see an animal suffer. So I saved the poor little thing, named her “Sassy,” and found a sweet, caring family to adopt her and give her a loving home.
And they in turn sold her to me for 20 bucks
So let me guess Vick. You tied the puppy to an oak tree with fishing wire and used it for crossbow target practice?
OF COURSE NOT. DON’T BE RIDICULOUS
I stapled it to the tree. You know, to cut down on the squirming
YOU STAPLED POOR LITTLE SASSY TO AN OAK TREE?
Yes, but I renamed her “Bullseye.”
THAT SHIT IS WACK, YO.
HOW’D YOU ASS-WAFFLES LIKE WATCHING ME ON HBO’S "HARD KNOCKS" THIS WEEK?
3 hours ago . Like
Whoop-de-shit. It’s a well-known fact that doing an HBO show is a huge jinx
Just ask Robb Stark
Hey, hey! How about a SPOILER ALERT? I’m still in the middle of season one.
Too bad your career isn’t.
HE’S SAYING THAT VINCE YOUNG WAS ONLY GOOD DURING HIS FIRST NFL SEASON.
Well personally, I’m thrilled to be a part of the Hard Knocks series
STFU Green-Ellis. You’ll probably end up getting cut in week 9 anyway.
Again, just like Robb Stark.
Well I guess we should be wrapping this up.
We’re ending the convo already?
Wow, this sure does feel like a short one.
Ooh, I know that question. “What is, ‘Things said by every woman who’s ever had Drew Brees’ penis inside her’”
It’s a trick question! No woman has ever had Drew Brees’ penis inside her.
For your information, I'm married with three kids.
All of whom look like me.
MATT RYAN IS CLAIMING TO HAVE EJACULATED HIS SPERM INSIDE DREW BREES’ WIFE AT LEAST THREE TIMES.
I’m just looking forward to the end of this boring-ass preseason
Yep. I can’t think of nine more beautiful words in the English language than “The regular season starts in just four more weeks.”
What is, “Golden Tate is ruled to have possession. Touchdown Seahawks?”
I WILL SUPER GLUE DOG FUR TO YOUR FACE, NAIL A TAIL INTO YOUR ASS, AND PUT YOU IN A BASKET ON MICHAEL VICK’S DOORSTEP WILSON!
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